Sunday, May 15, 2005

Good thing I'm allergic to cats

You'll have to forgive me in advance for the deviation from my usual topic of classroom-related conversation.

I went out with some girl friends last night. We had a great time - had dinner & drinks and chatted until the restaurant closed. We got to talking about men and relationships, as we're wont to do when we get together, and one friend (a former teacher) said, "Have you met anyone?" This is girl-code for, "Have you met any men that you're interested in dating?" Sadly, my answer was no. One of the huge disadvantages of teaching, especially in an elementary school, is the lack of men. Grad school isn't much better, considering that my major is in the education field. Last semester in my linguistics class, there were 20 women and only 1 man. I've done the bar scene in the past. Bleh. I mean, it's fine for hanging out and dancing and drinking (of course), but I never had any luck meeting guys there.

Former Teacher said, "We need to formulate a plan to get you to meet some men." I'm not sure what kind of plan she has in mind. She's just as single as I am. She's been doing the online dating thing for over a year, with little success. I refuse to waste my money on that.

There are times when I feel like I'm destined for a life of spinster-hood, living alone in an apartment with 45 cats. I'm 27 already. When my mother was 27, she had been married for five years and had one child. It makes me feel old. And having friends get married left and right isn't helping much either. I've been asked to be involved in 3 weddings in 3 years. It gets a little overwhelming.

Sometimes I feel like 27 isn't all that old. But let's say that I meet a guy this year, date him for 6 months to a year, get engaged, get married a year later, get pregnant... I'll be 30 before I have a kid. And that's only if I meet my future husband tomorrow. Sheesh. It makes my head spin.

Is anyone else out there going through the same thing? For the love of God, make yourselves heard and save my sanity!


Pigs said...

I'm reading the book Last Chance Saloon and the character had the same conversation! Except she wasn't a teacher. I agree it's hard to meet people being an elementary school teacher. Not that everyone meets people at work, but you meet people who can introduce you to people....etc. In a school it seems like it's mostly people who are settled and married with kids and it's not really conducive to meeting anyone. It's tough. My teammate really did meet someone on though! Ha!

Rebecca said...

Hi. I’ve been reading your blog for the past few weeks and it’s really interesting and informative (from my point-of-view as a perspective teacher). I’m doing a project for my educational psychology class and was wondering if I could ask you a few questions via e-mail, but I don’t see an e-mail address on your blog. I was wondering if you could e-mail me, or somehow let me know your e-mail address, so that I could give you a little information about my project. Then, if you want to answer some questions for me, you could. Thanks so much! (My e-mail address is jacobso1[at]grinnell[dot]edu - change the [at] to @ and the [dot] to . )

Diversity? said...

Have you ever considered joining an organizatiion which trys to hook up singles with the same interests, (music, books, politics, etc.)? My wife met me through such an organization. It is, called the Single Music and Book Lovers Club. My wife was past 30 when we met, I was 36, we will be married 12 years this month, and we couldn't be happier. With the internet this should be easier then ever. I did it in 1992 without a computer and I found my match. 27 is not old, and people in these clubs are looking for serious marriage prospects. A potential candidate in groups like the one I used give you the man's age occupation, education and away from work interests. Also he needn't be 12 years or more older than you. These people are serious,
I was. Only the shallowest of men think they need to be much older. What would a man 10 or more years older than you neccesarily have in common with you? Find one which suits your interests, you could be as happy as we are.

8o8gnsurfing said...

Hey Dree,
Well my dear rest assure I for one is still single. You know when i was 27 I thought I would be married with kids, but I suppose it doest happen the way we plan it. I still believe theres someone out there for somebody. Anyways, still enjoy reading your blog. Alohaz.

MandyGirl said...

My comment may be a bit late, but here it is anyway...

I'm also an elementary school teacher, 27 years old (28 next month) and I don't "go out" enough to meet people. I've got lots of friends and most of my coworkers are married, so I agree with you that it's just a tough situation. One teacher at my school met her fiancee on the internet, so I tried it out. I ended up meeting a guy who lived in the same state, but about 10 hours away (Texas is huge). We "dated" for about three months but it didn't work out. Now I'm back to square one. I'm a great catch (not to brag, but you know), and it's not like I haven't had guys as me out, but I'm really picky about who I want to spend the rest of my life with. It sucks. I know this isn't much consolation, but at least you know there are other single girls out here! :)

la maestra said...

yeah, well you know how i'm doing on the singles scene! i was thinking the same sad thoughts last night... i used to have a ten-year plan that involved me getting married by 26 and having my first kid by 28. i wouldn't feel so bad about it if i didn't know two 22-yr-olds that are getting married. blech! screw online dating, someone needs to set up a sexy single teacher and firefighter service, er, i mean field trip! =)